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What to do when you feel therapy isn't working

Frequent therapy visits can help many individuals better navigate challenges. Some patients may take time to see results and therapy may not work for everyone. For patients who feel therapy isn’t working, there are some other options that can be effective.

How To Know When Therapy Isn’t Working

Not everyone will find the results they need from therapy. This can be because you didn’t set the right goals, you’re not connecting with your therapist, or you need more intense care. Some signs to look for that will help you indicate that therapy isn’t working include:

You feel your therapist isn’t listening or understanding you
You don’t notice a reduction in your symptoms after 6 sessions
You leave each session feeling disappointed
You aren’t getting any insights into your mental illness or your symptoms
You feel judged by your therapist

Reassess Your Goals

Before you start therapy, you should be setting goals of what you hope to accomplish during your sessions. Setting goals will help you go into each session with a purpose and help your therapist formulate a plan to help you achieve them. If you feel your goals are not being met, you may feel that therapy isn’t working. However, reassessing your goals or making new ones can help make sessions feel more beneficial. Try setting shorter-term goals that are easily attainable.

Increase The Frequency Of Sessions

It may seem counterproductive to increase your therapy sessions if you aren’t seeing results, but studies have shown that increasing therapy sessions can provide sustained improvement. Going to therapy more often will help you avoid spiraling emotions and better prepare you for life’s challenges. If there is a long break between sessions, you may find yourself slipping back into old habits, rather than using the techniques suggested in therapy.

Try Another Therapist

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Every therapist is different, utilizing different techniques to help unique patients. Not all patients will feel supported by every therapist. Because we are all human, some of us will have different experiences and you may not form a connection with a therapist. When you feel judged or misunderstood, you should start looking into other licensed therapists.

Explore Medication Options

Depending on your struggle or mental illness, medication may be a helpful option to limit symptoms. Some patients find that medication combined with therapy is most beneficial in helping them cope. Dealing with mental illness or trauma is not a linear process, so mixing and matching treatment methods will help with the ebbs and flows.

Try A Different Therapy Type

As more research is done in the mental health world, there are different types of therapy and coping techniques to try. Many therapy techniques are general for most patients but can be specialized to fit your goals.

Individual therapy can feel isolation for many people, so if you feel therapy isn’t working, try a group therapy session or go with your partner. Group therapy sessions or even a guided support group will help us feel less alone in our struggles. Struggling alone is never necessary, you can find a therapy that works best for you.

Discuss Your Concerns With Your Therapist

If your therapist’s technique or communication style isn’t why you feel therapy isn’t working, try discussing your concerns with them. A therapist is there to help you through all the different stages of life. Discussing your concerns and reservations about therapy will help them pivot your treatment.

Individual Counseling From Ogden Psychological Services

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Ogden Psychological Services offers multiple counseling options for anxiety, depression, autism, PTSD, anger, trauma, and more. Our therapy practices are based on the most recent evidence and we continue to learn and grow in our mental health knowledge. Our most popular option is individual counseling, where you get to sit down one-on-one with your therapist to help navigate the challenges of life.

We understand that life is challenging. There are always going to be changes and heartache during your lifetime. Seeking therapy early in life can set you up for success in the years to come. Working with a therapist helps individuals develop coping skills that will help them live a more emotionally balanced life.
OPS wants you to feel comfortable in our office, but if you aren’t connecting with your therapist, we totally understand the need to move on. Reach out to us to learn more about our counselors and therapists and schedule an appointment today!

Daily challenges, mistrust in past relationships, trauma, mental illness, and neglect can all affect a close relationship. In order to nurture healthy relationships, all individuals will have to put in consistent work. Whether it is a family relationship, friendship, or romantic relationship, both parties need to put in work and communicate to help avoid unnecessary tension.

Whether in a committed relationship or growing a new relationship, following these tips can help individuals grow more respect for a family member, partner, or friend. Here are our tips to help improve many different relationships.

1- Build Trust

Being honest and reliable will help all people in your life to trust you. Both parties should work to make good relationship choices, respect the other partner’s boundaries, and put their partner first. Trust is essential in healthy relationships because it keeps us from constant worry.

For those who have had their trust broken in past relationships, it may take longer for a new partner to build trust with these individuals. Breaking trust in a relationship can do long-term damage to both partners.

2- Focus On Effective Communication

Humans are not able to read each other’s minds or understand what is needed in a relationship if we don’t communicate. Clear and effective communication is the best way to nurture a healthy relationship.

While most people believe that communication is just talking, it is much more than that. In relationships, platonic and romantic, it is important to listen actively. Listening with the intent to hear them out, rather than just responding, will show investment in the other person’s feelings. Pay attention to verbal and nonverbal communication as well.

Being vulnerable with a partner or friend will help both parties build more trust while also learning how to better serve each other. Communicate emotions and needs without placing blame on the other partner in the relationship.

3- Find Shared Goals And Interests

To keep relationships strong, couples or friends should find activities they like to do together. Having shared interests not only makes quality time together more enjoyable but also creates a topic of discussion for downtime as well.

Many couples share the same goals when they first get together, however, our goals and dreams can change over time. For relationships that are struggling, having a quarterly check-in and creating combined goals will help you both have something to look forward to. Even if individuals are working toward separate goals, having goals that focus on self-improvement can help aid in nurturing healthy relationships.

4- Address Issues Promptly

Another common problem in relationships is conflict resolution. If you want to nurture a healthy relationship, you need to address issues promptly and in a healthy way. Letting problems fester and not communicating how something affected an individual will just drive a wedge between each party.

Not all problems are going to be able to be brushed under the rug. Working together to find a practical solution or compromise will help keep the relationship strong. Conflict resolution is not everyone’s strong suit, so if partners or friends have difficulty problem-solving, try working with a therapist.

5- Maintain Independence

Having friends and a romantic partner can be very fulfilling, but when we start to depend on others, the relationship can suffer. Becoming dependent on another person for happiness and validation will put a strain on the relationship. It can also make a breakup feel even more debilitating when that financial, emotional, or physical support is gone. During a relationship, we should maintain some independence and allow our partner or friend to do the same. This allows for a natural balance of connection and individual growth.

6- Be Adaptable

We live in an ever-changing world, which means that relationships are bound to have different seasons and waves of connection. Depending on the type of relationship, children, jobs, sleep schedules, medication, family death, siblings, friends, pets, and even the weather can change a relationship dynamic.

If you set healthy boundaries and have communication with your partner, individuals will be able to adapt to different stages of life. What worked at the beginning of a relationship may not work 10 years later. Adaptability is key to nurturing healthy relationships.

7- Have Regular Check-Ins

A vulnerable talk about how each person is feeling about the relationship will help both parties to pivot or change course if needed. Regular check-ins help partners have a safe space to share what they need more of or less of.

8- Relationship Counseling

Some couples, family members, or even friends can benefit from counseling. Most counseling sessions are built around romantic partners and their problems. Seeking the help of a therapist can facilitate healthy communication, teach problem-solving techniques, or point out areas that both parties could work on. A therapist is an unbiased third party, which means they won’t take sides or push some sort of narrative. Couples counseling is often referred to as maintenance. Just like the tune-ups and maintenance needed for a car, relationships can also benefit from regular maintenance.

Ogden Psychological Services offers couples counseling, individual therapy, and family therapy to help individuals nurture healthy relationships. We are here to make sure the members of our community take control of their emotions and mental health.

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Starting therapy can be overwhelming enough, but coming up with topics to talk about in therapy can be even harder. If you want to get the most out of your therapy conversations, this list of topics can help. The biggest reason that patients struggle to start therapy is because they feel uncomfortable talking about trauma. While therapy is the place to work through your trauma, there are other “safe” topics you can discuss with your therapist during sessions.

1- Your Feelings About Coming To Therapy

If you are first starting in therapy, starting with the why can be a great way to get the ball rolling. Your therapist will often ask you why you thought coming to therapy was necessary or what goals you are wanting to accomplish while having therapy sessions.

Some people may want to share their fears about coming to therapy, what they expect to do in each session, or how they want a therapist to approach certain triggering topics. This can be a great way for a therapist to get to know you and devise a plan of action for future sessions.

2- Update On Current Relationships

Navigating platonic or romantic relationships can be difficult when you are dealing with mental illness or past relationship trauma. Navigating relationships requires developing good communication skills which you can learn with your therapist. Talking to your therapist about all your relationships, healthy or unhealthy can help you understand how they affect your mental well-being.

3- Childhood Experiences

The experiences we have in our childhood can affect us for years into adulthood. Sometimes without us even realizing it. Even if your childhood wasn’t traumatic, other instances like family loss, financial struggles, or an absent parent could affect your mental health.

Diving into childhood trauma during therapy can be difficult, but a lot of your current issues could be stemming from past trauma. Throughout therapy sessions, you can work with your therapist to work slowly through your childhood experiences.

4- Life Changes Or Challenges

Some may assume that you can only talk about past experiences during therapy, but talking about your current life situations is something you can always talk about in therapy. Your current job, current relationship highs and lows, and even small annoyances can be beneficial for your therapist to hear about.

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5- Life Goals Or Short-Term Goals

As you move through different seasons of your life, your goals will change. If you are meeting with a therapist once a week, you may not feel the need to discuss your goals during every therapy session. However, if you are working towards a big goal giving an update to your therapist may help them suggest different ideas or techniques to help you.

6- What You Have Learned From Past Struggles

Therapy is all about growing and learning. If you are struggling with what to talk about in therapy, try talking about what you have learned from a past struggle. Your therapist may also be able to use this information to help show you that you can use what you learned to overcome a current problem.

7- Patterns You Are Noticing

Humans are creatures of habit, but not all of our habits and routines are healthy. If you have an addiction, bad financial coping habits, or anger control issues, noticing these patterns are common topic discussed in therapy. A therapist can give tools on how to notice patterns in your life and avoid the damaging effects of them. If you are looking for topics to talk about in therapy, talking about your routine may be the best way to get to the bottom of your issues.

8- Little Things That Make You Happy Lately

Not all of the topics you need to talk about in therapy need to be about mental struggles or past challenges. Little things that have made you smile or boosted your mood are good things to share with your therapist. This can also be a good time to see what habits could lead to bad patterns or what activities are healthy for you.

Not all your therapy topics need to be about challenges. When your life is going well or you are not focused on your mental challenges, sharing happy things with your therapist allows them to celebrate you!

9- Thoughts You Never Share With Anyone

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The difference between ranting to your best friend and talking to your therapist is that your therapist is required to protect your privacy. Everything you share with your therapist is confidential, which gives you the freedom to talk about thoughts you would never share with anyone else.

If you are scared of some of your mental processes or are feeling things you are not wanting to feel, working with a therapist can help reroute your thoughts and create new pathways in your brain.

10- What Scares You About Therapy

It is completely normal to feel nervous about attending therapy sessions. Sharing your fears or reasons you waited to start therapy can help your therapist dispel some of your fears. Therapists hear many people talk about their anxious thoughts about therapy and can help provide clarification on how therapy works and limit anxious thoughts.

What To Do When You Feel Therapy Isn’t Working